the funny shit thread

Ok, here's the deal. I suspect that you guys and girls have some pretty hilarious stories of stuff you've actually done, and I think it's time to share them. The only requirement is that it has to be true, and not exaggerated. That shit that Footballcat posted about the cyber-sex was funny as hell, and I want to laugh some more, so post away. I have one or two that I'll post, but I want to hear a couple first.

Ok, ill start on the funny shit thread.

This happen 10 weeks ago.

It was a long night of drinking, we had hit up like 3 house partys. Im not a heavy weight drinker, but i was trying to hold my own. So the first house ihad like 5 beers, the next house i had 4 more. So we are coming to the third house, by this time im smashed, stumbling, no way i was goin to play quarters.

So i sit down and have another beer, I was feeling pretty good, so i had another. This is when i fucked up, bout half the beer is gone, so i make the trip outside to show off what i had for dinner. Well im letting it all out, and end up getting it all over my shoes. So i walk back inside feeling like shit, and tell my roommate im headin home.

So i make it back ok, didnt see any cops. And Decide to get ready for bed. So i remember taking off my shirt.

Fast forward 10am sunday morning. My buddy told me how druck i was last night, and how i peed all over my roommates closit. I said theres no way, hes like yeah i watched you pee all over it. I said theres no way, so i walk over there and start feeling the clothes yeah,they were drenched in some type of liquid. I take it as my piss. One bad night of drinking

not me but a good friend of mine went out with his girlfriend to a work related party. he got smashed went back home with her and woke up at 5 am walked over to the corner and started pissing on the wall and rug. she asks him what the fuck are you doing and he just mumbles bach. shh, shh it's ok don't worry. finishes and crawls back in bed with her.and he's proud of it too.tells everyone. same friend different night, we met some roomates and went back to their hotel, he passes out on the floor, pisses his pants, wakes up in the middle of the night, takes his pants off and hides it, than crawls into bed with the other girl.

LOL

I got another on about drinking.

My bro comes down to go to a party. Hes a SR in high school, so we go to the party and they have Ice House Kegs, so im like drink, and i keep filling him up. About 2 we come back and order food, hes like i want to watch TV so i let him. So im down in a girls room, and come back to see if the pizza place has called. Hes passed out wtith the phone in his hand. Adn puke all over my bed. I was like u puke on my bed, NO.

So i threw away all my sheets, still denys it to this day

good ones... drinking seems to be involved a lot, and was here too;

When I was in HS, some buds and I used to ride around in a stationwagon with a pony keg tapped. We'd sometimes throw a jacket over it to be discreet. All night we'd chase women and stop at places to have drinks with people we knew.
One night we were pretty loaded, and driving on Beechmont Ave. in Cincy, a 4 lane road, yelling and waving at other cars on the road. That wasn't such a big deal, except we were going 45mph along-side of them....drunk...and in reverse. They all slowed down and stayed the hell away from us....wonder why?