S
scorpio
Guest
Idiot Want Ads
> 1. Illiterate? Write today for free help.
>
> 2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll
> never go anywhere again.
> 3. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and
> smacks included.
> 4. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
>
> 5. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
>
> 6. Stock up and save. Limit: one.
>
> 7. Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
>
> 8. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
>
> 9. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for
> efficient beating.
> 10. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue
> Cross and salary.
> 11. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2. 35; Chicken or Beef $2. 25; Children =
$2.00
>
> 12. For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large
> drawers.
> 13. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to
> take home, too.
> 14. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by
hand.
>
> 15. For sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. Great Dames for sale.
>
> 16. Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
>
> 17. Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.
>
> 18. Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts. Zap
> does the job in 24 hours.
> 19. Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates.
> Automatically burns toast.
> 20. For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
>
> 21. Man, honest. Will take anything.
>
> 22. Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.
>
> 23. Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
>
> 24. Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential.
>
> 25. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
>
> 26. Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
>
> 27. Wanted. Widower with school age children requires person to assume
> general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of
> family.
> 28. And now, the Superstore-unequaled in size, unmatched in variety,
> unrivaled inconvenience.
> 29. We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for
> $1.00.
> 30. Free Beer!!. Tomorrow!
>
>
>
> 1. Illiterate? Write today for free help.
>
> 2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll
> never go anywhere again.
> 3. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and
> smacks included.
> 4. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
>
> 5. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
>
> 6. Stock up and save. Limit: one.
>
> 7. Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
>
> 8. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
>
> 9. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for
> efficient beating.
> 10. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue
> Cross and salary.
> 11. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2. 35; Chicken or Beef $2. 25; Children =
$2.00
>
> 12. For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large
> drawers.
> 13. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to
> take home, too.
> 14. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by
hand.
>
> 15. For sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. Great Dames for sale.
>
> 16. Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
>
> 17. Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.
>
> 18. Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts. Zap
> does the job in 24 hours.
> 19. Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates.
> Automatically burns toast.
> 20. For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
>
> 21. Man, honest. Will take anything.
>
> 22. Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.
>
> 23. Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
>
> 24. Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential.
>
> 25. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
>
> 26. Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
>
> 27. Wanted. Widower with school age children requires person to assume
> general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of
> family.
> 28. And now, the Superstore-unequaled in size, unmatched in variety,
> unrivaled inconvenience.
> 29. We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for
> $1.00.
> 30. Free Beer!!. Tomorrow!
>
>
>
