House guest I want to kill

Back in August my buddy asked me if I want to make some extra cash. He told me one of our friends is looking for a place to stay until he can get into some apartment to rent during the winter. I have a house and live by myself. He had this dude call me and ask me if he could move in until January. Of course he is paying rent. I should have known better. If there is one thing I cannot stand it is inconsiderate slobs! This dude and I have argued about every day. Thank god he is leaving soon, he was supposed to be out last month but the owner of the appartment to which he is moving will not be out until 2/1. I would go crazy on him otherwise. I don't know if this dude is just plain stupid or takes me for a softee, I asked him. This prick never leaves first of all, he's always here 24/7 besides his 8 hour work day. He shaves in the sink and does not clean out the hair, can't miss the floor when he takes a piss, I always have to tell him to lower his shitty music at night, leaves dirty dishes in the sinks, walks in with his dirty ass shoes on even though I told him over and over that my house is shoes off, never cleans the stove top after cooking some messy shit, the list goes on and on. I have almost come to blows with him. The other day I just went off. I came in and he must have been sleeping in the room I gave him and there was food boiling over on the stove. I aksed him if he was just another dumb white man or did he want to see me go to jail for killing his ass. He does not confront me and appologizes all the time but I really think he is not that bright. I should just kick his ass out and have a few times but my buddy, a mutual friend calls me on his behalf and comes and helps him clean up his friggin messes after I throw a fit. Man, I will never do this stupid shit again. I just hope if a woman ever moves in with me she knows not to fuck around.

LOL. If my wife ever throws me out I'll know where to go.
Hang in there, I'm sure your other friend appreciates it. It sounds as though he is a little soft, so to speak.

Glad to see your such a neat freak i hate slobs. Umm no offense if you take it any bad way.

I let a friend move in for "a couple weeks", then after his lazy ass sat on my couch everyday I gave him a job making 800-1000 per week. The fucker never bought groceries, laundry detergent, beer or anything and never offered to pay for anything. He told his Mom I only paid him 400 per week and charged him rent so she would take him to the grocery store. Then he started showing up late to work so I kicked his dumbass out and fired him. I normally wouldn't do that, but he was taking advantage of me and I am a very giving person.

My advice is kick this guy out bro.

Kick his ass sea bass. Although I was highly offended by your use of the term "white man", I see your point. My former roommates wanted to beat me up for living like a caged mountain goat.

Next time he's praying to Allah, throw pork at him. Problem solved.

dude, i know exactly how you feel. When i went to school in NYC i lived in an apartment with friends of friends from home since they were going to school where i was as well. I was the only one that worked because their parents paid for everything for them so i would go to school, gym, work and then home and find the place an utter mess. I would always cook dinner for the three of us and get stuck cleaning up afterwards. They would always get drunk as hell, break something and not even pick it up. Its horrible isnt it? I too will never do that again, just think though...your almost free! good luck keeping your sanity for the next week or so bro.

BiggerStronger has a story about this...tell 'em about "Larry"

And I lived with "Larry" in two situations. He is a nice guy but a complete slob.

It just came to mind, one time I walked-in on him to wake him up because his alarm was going off for 30-40 minutes and it woke me up down the hall. I go in there and there are two empty tubs of ice cream in the bed with him. Melted ice cream all down the side of his bed and shit. At least, I hope it was ice cream running down the sheets.

jaywooly said:

It just came to mind, one time I walked-in on him to wake him up because his alarm was going off for 30-40 minutes and it woke me up down the hall. I go in there and there are two empty tubs of ice cream in the bed with him. Melted ice cream all down the side of his bed and shit. At least, I hope it was ice cream running down the sheets.

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omg!!!!Thats hilarious jay! The guy slept through that huh, and alarm and taking a bath in melted ice cream, lol

i think im that guy lol!

Hang in there Glenn, it sounds like you've made it very clear what you expect from him and he continually doesn't respect it or like you said he's just not very bright.

Try and have a hear to heart with him, be very clear and try not to raise your voice and keep your cool. Tell him how it's disrespectful and hurtful for him to take advantage of you like this... tell him it really hurts. If the heart to heart doesn't work then you can consider having a fist to head confrontation with him

No lies, this mutherfer was sleeping in garbage. On his bed. It wasn't as funny then for some reason.

jaywooly said:

No lies, this mutherfer was sleeping in garbage. On his bed. It wasn't as funny then for some reason.

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i would be none to pleased either, especially if the alarm had been going off that long.

it does sound funny now but that's just wrong on sooo many levels

Hey man, that alarm thing happens here too. This friggin guys alarm sounds like a truck backing up. He sets it for 5 am, hits snooze every 10 minutes and gets out of bed at 7. This fucker does not shower too much, good for me, save the hot water for my shower. I won't try to talk to this fool at this point, he is out of here the 1st and I will never rent out a room in El Casa Whitestone again. I'll save the heart to heart talk for someone with a pair of tits! Nice right?

Hahhahahaha!

I just hope if a woman ever moves in with me she knows not to fuck around.

Hey Glenn!! I'm sorry you have to live through that, but every guy just like every girl is different. I've been told women are worse than men when it comes to being a slob and gross crap like you are experiencing.

But you'll know when you get to know your lady if she is like that. Take a close look at her apartment/house to find out if she is cleanly. I'm bad for picking up stuff (throw clothes on the bed in the morning...place them on the floor at night), but not as bad as you're describing...ouch!!!

Sorry I couldn't rest your mind on women moving in.

walk around with a hard on and just stare at him. keep doing that and i am sure he will eventually leave on his own

TheElmo said:

walk around with a hard on and just stare at him. keep doing that and i am sure he will eventually leave on his own

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hahahaha, thats some sick shit. seriously tho, make him feel uncomfortable, you cant let him be the boss in UR house.

oh yeah and don't forget to flex while you're doing this