My girl of 4 years just broke up with me

whats up..i'm fairly new to this board but i like the friendliness and just the overall good vibe of this board..i need to rant..my girl of almost 4 years broke up with me tonight cause she needed some time for herself..4 fuckin years i spent with this girl and she needs her space..we've had our ups and downs but our relationship has always been good..man, its 4 oclock in the morning and my mind is going crazy..i did everything for this girl, i thought she was the one..i really don't know what to do now..i have a strong feeling  that she is  f*cking around with someone else, and that just hurts me to no end..and she is planning a trip by herself to go across the country for a week, nice timing..sorry if my thoughts seem incoherent...i just don't know what to do

???  

chrisROCK
RaVe

hey.. that really sux bro.. so manu different things you can do.. the first one that comes to mind is see when she's leaving and go see her off in a nice way..and then you can tell if she's going alone or.. anyway that will show that you care for her as a human being.. anyway how things get  better fast..

Time heals all bro. I just went through this same exact shit at christmas time. I transfered schools (away from my girl) and at the end of last semester she says "Its too hard to be apart" so she dumps me cause she needs her space. Doesnt make any sense to me but i guess she is happy so thats all that matters. If you need to talk PM me, id be more than happy to help. I know it sucks but trust me time will heal it, everyone told me that and i didnt really understand but as the days pass you will understand. I loved this girl more than life itself so i understand how much you hurt. Just stay strong and keep busy, surrond yourself with good friends and family, and even better goto the gym when you feel really depressed, it helped me alot.

Sorry to hear that bro. Breakups are hard. All I can say, is it does get better over time. If you honestly feel she has been unfaithful, its probably for the best anyway. Take your frustrations out in the gym, and try not to let it get you completely out of focus. Usually I would say "go get laid", but after 4 years, that might not be the best idea. Just give it some time, and don't forget who you are bro. Later

thanks bros..i just found out that for her trip she is going to his home state to see him, and she's been talking to him behind my back for the last 4 months, which is fucked up..i know that i should just forget her but its 4 years of love, being together...i told her it was either my or him and she decided to go see him (2000 miles away)...i'm gonna hit the gym so hard..its just this is my first real breakup (only 24, seeing her since i was 20) and it fuckin sucks..anyways enough of the wining, i'm gonna go hit the gym and take out my frustrations...thanks again

chrisROCK
RaVe

Sorry to hear that.  I know that feeling and it sucks.  And  to find out its for another guy...that would kill me!!!  BUT keep your head up because things like that happen for a reason.   Now you know the real reason and you can move on.  The gym is a great outlet for this type of situation--you can focus all your anger and hurt to training---it sure does help release alot of the stress     Who knows, you might even meet someone new there.

Well take Care!!

Spanishfly

that sux....but time to move on....

thanks....

chrisROCK
RaVe

Hang in bro , and were all here behind you bro.

Well obviously your better off without her, better to find out now than later on down the road. Be strong

Yeah bro...chalk it up as HER loss. Concentrate on your anger when your in the gym and let it EXPLODE!!!!! I can feel for ya man....I went thru a 5-yr break up awhile back too. I started working out with a friend to get my mind off of her...well that was like 5 yrs ago. I just never stopped working out ..lol. I saw her at Wal-Mart last year and her jaw sorta dropped when I said" Hi" and kept walking. Just look forward to the day when you see your ex and the same thing happens. She will realize that you were the best man for her. Consider it a blessing bro. think of all the shitty times and all the stuff you hate about her    its silly but it works!
    You got a whole site here pulling for ya! Lets see some before g-friend..and afters bro!!!

I definately feel for ya Bro. I dont know what it is about Christmas but I have a shitty one every year if Im with a girlfriend. I mention this cause someone mentioned Christmas time.
As for losing your girl, I know what you're going through right now, cause Ive been there, and the only thing that helps is passing time. I for one am different cause the last thing I feel like doing when Im down is go to the gym. I have tried this many times but always end up doin a couple sets and leaving. For some reason I cannot clear my head when Im stessed and hit the weights.
My girlfriend and I have been together now for over two years, and let me tell ya, weve had our share of tough times!. She's a stripper, and I dont care what anyone tells you, it's not the best thing to happen to a guy, like some guys will tell you. She's gone for sometimes three weeks at a time, and I cant tell you the roller coaster of emotions youre mind goes through!. In the beginning it never really bothered me until about a year and a half in the relationship, when you start second guessing yourself, if this is the girl you want to be with forever. It's no fun knowing that 200 guys a day get to see the one thing that only I should be seeing. And no matter how much she has her head on straight, does'nt party much, and tells you how much she loves you, something in the back of you're mind tells you to always be cautious.
I started out wanting to say how things will improve as time passes and I end up telling everyone my drama, lol. I could keep writing for hours but we'll just leave it at that for now. <!--emo&FF--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/bored.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='FF'><!--endemo-->  *Mr Test*

the plot thickens..i found out the email addy of the kid shes fucking around with and i emailed him and told him the situation..she knows my password to my zip (i know pretty stupid) and i told her i emailed him..do u know what she did? she broke into my zip and emailed him posing at me and told him there was nothing between us and that i don't want her anymore...that is some fucked up shit...i'm glad this happened cause i don't want a girl like this who is going to fuck my over until i'm 6 feet under...man this is fucked up..thanks for the support, i appreciate it..and sandra, if your reading this, u are a coldhearted bitch...

chrisROCK
RaVe

Whatever you do Bro, and this is important!, do not, and I mean do not play into her fucked up games!, they love doin this, and love the attention, even when it's negative!.
My advice is to get rid of, or let her pick up anything laying around that belongs to her, always remain cheerful when you see her, cause she wants you to be fucked up over this. Just get rid of anything that will give her the excuse to come visit or have contact, even the e-mail address, and act the perfect gentleman if you run into her, chance are she'll probably come crawling back to you when she realizes that you were'nt such a bad guy afterall. Their were reasons you stayed together for four years, and she will realize this in time, but by that time you will have gained the upper hand!. People always have the notion that the grass is greener on the other side, well let me tell ya nine times out of ten it aint. I've had  girls dump me, but you know what, almost all of them have made an attempt to get back together with me, but I live by the rule, once the relationship is over I cut off complete contact with them, phone calls, everything. I believe once the milk goes sour theirs no use trying to make it sweet again, and it would only be a matter of time till the same arguments, and reasons for the break-up come up again. Anyway thats my long winded 2 cents......*Mr Test*

<!--QuoteBegin--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->Mr Test Posted on Mar. 17 2002,6:57
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Whatever you do Bro, and this is important!, do not, and I mean do not play into her fucked up games!, they love doin this, and love the attention, even when it's negative!.
My advice is to get rid of, or let her pick up anything laying around that belongs to her, always remain cheerful when you see her, cause she wants you to be fucked up over this. Just get rid of anything that will give her the excuse to come visit or have contact, even the e-mail address, and act the perfect gentleman if you run into her, chance are she'll probably come crawling back to you when she realizes that you were'nt such a bad guy afterall. Their were reasons you stayed together for four years, and she will realize this in time, but by that time you will have gained the upper hand!. People always have the notion that the grass is greener on the other side, well let me tell ya nine times out of ten it aint. I've had  girls dump me, but you know what, almost all of them have made an attempt to get back together with me, but I live by the rule, once the relationship is over I cut off complete contact with them, phone calls, everything. I believe once the milk goes sour theirs no use trying to make it sweet again, and it would only be a matter of time till the same arguments, and reasons for the break-up come up again. Anyway thats my long winded 2 cents......*Mr Test* [/quote]

Wise words bro...Could not have said it better myself.

That sucks man, sorry to hear it.When your together with someone that long it feels like you were married.DONT EVER CALL NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO TALK TO HER.Dude she'll wonder why you haven't called.Let her make all the moves.If she doesn't call you back or communicate with you than move on.If she calls back than just act normal."The longest road to travel for a man in from his heart to his brain" by Senior Hairynutz always keep this in mind.