Overcoming mental issues pre-contest time

OK as I previously posted, I'm doing a contest this April after more than 20 years of my last one. So I have to test myself mentally every day. I'm proud to say that all but about 3 days in the last 2 months have I failed myself. But now I'm confronted with a potential personal issue that could destroy my ambitions.

It involves my GF of 3 yrs and I breaking up. I've been a bachelor all my life (51) and have always had ass at my disposal. Of course at my age, the younger ones don't throw their panties at me anymore, something which was a huge blow to my ego. But I can hold my own against any guy from 30's on up. I do have a once in a blue moon booty call I can have, but she's a bit of a head case and flaks out on me a lot.

I'm sure a lot of you have gone thru this tough break up time....how did you handle it? I've heard my ex is dating someone, so like on the weekends its tough waking up alone in my bed early on a Sunday morning, knowing there's a good chance my ex is lying in bed with her new BF, getting laid. Then I have to get up mentally for a workout on top of that. Can anyone relate to that and how did you mentally block it? I know I can do it, just need some tips.

Thanks guys (or gals)

Damn bro, well I've been through this with my wife leaving and moving out for 3 months with her parents, she came back but during that time....yeah it was hell wondering if she was banging anyone else, or even coming back ect..

Truth is their is nothing to do to get over it other then have time pass by, and by the time I got to the point where i didnt give a fuck anymore whether she came back or not she ofcourse caught that vibe and came back,lol

So i have no secrets for ya bro other then letting time pass,lol, i knmow not the answwer ur looking for but its all I got

Well I have been through a cheating wife with her ex husband while getting ready for a show.
It definitely is one big head fuck, but you have to be strong enough the create a thick skin to get to your goal.
As you know, it is a HUGE investment in time and money to get ready for a show. You can't go half ass into it.
I just left a relationship earlier this year where she did not want me to go to the gym and further she said she would leave if I was to start getting ready for a show- I left before that happened. Additionally, I am being test every 6 months for diabetes and prostate cancer.
So you see, you have to rise above that and do it for yourself. Unless you are married and have a woman that understands contest prep, its easier to go at it alone- single women want attention - more attention that you can give them especially when getting ready for a show.
Don't get bogged down in the details- do this for you and don't let anyone get in your way. If you cannot commit to it , the take a step back and decide what you really want. My two cents.

Presser and MMX, thanks for the words of wisdom. They have inspired me to rise above all this crap right now. As much as I wouldn't wish this on anyone, its comforting to know I'm not alone in this battle. Your average Joe would come apart at the seams. I have to be stronger.

Presser you were right on about how women can pick up that you are indifferent to the break up. I work with my ex and for the first 6 weeks or so she acted very aloof and cold around me. Nothing but business, short and sweet. Now the last few days she's acting bit warmer. She's now talking personal stuff to me, about her kids and so on. Even a breif text thanking me for being there. This morning I slapped her on the ass just to flirt. I think she liked it.....just told a co worker that I thought the reason she was acting cold to me was because I wasn't trying anything to get her back. I wasn't acting needy. That called her bluff, it seams.

It can be a lonely world being a competitve BB, but as Arnold said in Pumping Iron, you have to cut your emotions off totally before a show. I beleive this mental toughness is whats sets us apart from the average person.

The last 3 weeks of my very first show I found out my gf at the time was cheating on me with a 17 yr old...lots of drama and stress...the show gave me something to focus on...it seemed like the end of the world at the time...she was one of my employees and I took the high road and got a transfer (even though I was taking a 2-3k dollar paycut leaving an established location that I was at from opening day on)...it all worked out as I later met the girl of my dreams who runs circles around my ex....who btw has now gained 30lbs and doesn't even look near the same...use it as ur fuel...yr motivation

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Plang said:

The last 3 weeks of my very first show I found out my gf at the time was cheating on me with a 17 yr old...lots of drama and stress...the show gave me something to focus on...it seemed like the end of the world at the time...she was one of my employees and I took the high road and got a transfer (even though I was taking a 2-3k dollar paycut leaving an established location that I was at from opening day on)...it all worked out as I later met the girl of my dreams who runs circles around my ex....who btw has now gained 30lbs and doesn't even look near the same...use it as ur fuel...yr motivation

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I have a similiar mindset as Plang. I helped my now ex go from her first figure show to a pro card in one season. She then started fucking a 50 year old married guy and told me she wanted a divorce. I had to sell my house, I lost every penny, slept on a friends couch, and was starting a new job at the same time! So what did I do?? I decided to do a bodybuilding show!! I won the overall with 4 weeks of dieting and prep. It got me through the rough stuff. I just immersed myself in it. Now that I've put on substantial size I'm doing the Southern States in July. She won the show as her 2nd show in '07. I'm sure she will be there. I'm also going to show off my current girl who is twice as hot! Its going to be a good show!

The Dude said:

I have a similiar mindset as Plang. I helped my now ex go from her first figure show to a pro card in one season. She then started fucking a 50 year old married guy and told me she wanted a divorce. I had to sell my house, I lost every penny, slept on a friends couch, and was starting a new job at the same time! So what did I do?? I decided to do a bodybuilding show!! I won the overall with 4 weeks of dieting and prep. It got me through the rough stuff. I just immersed myself in it. Now that I've put on substantial size I'm doing the Southern States in July. She won the show as her 2nd show in '07. I'm sure she will be there. I'm also going to show off my current girl who is twice as hot! Its going to be a good show!

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Im guessing the 50yr old dude has MONEY bro! ?

Presser said:

Im guessing the 50yr old dude has MONEY bro! ?

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I'm gonna go out on a limb and day yes...I hate to stereotype but I'm sure u have seen some of these choads these pro figure/fitness/bikini girls get with...it ain't looks or love


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Presser said:

Im guessing the 50yr old dude has MONEY bro! ?

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Yes. He's a multi millionaire, but all of the money is on the wife's side of the family, hence he will never divorce her. He gave her a $3500 a month "sponsorship". Its funny all the ways people dress up the word "whore". On a side note she hasn't even placed in a show since I stopped training her.
Sorry about getting off topic OP. My point was to use the situation as immense motivation and quite frankly I wouldn't pay her the slightest amount of attention. Let her see you transform into a shredded monster and let her kick herself in the ass for screwing things up with you. She's a captive audience.

The Dude said:

Yes. He's a multi millionaire, but all of the money is on the wife's side of the family, hence he will never divorce her. He gave her a $3500 a month "sponsorship". Its funny all the ways people dress up the word "whore". On a side note she hasn't even placed in a show since I stopped training her.
Sorry about getting off topic OP. My point was to use the situation as immense motivation and quite frankly I wouldn't pay her the slightest amount of attention. Let her see you transform into a shredded monster and let her kick herself in the ass for screwing things up with you. She's a captive audience.

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Hey no problem getting off topic, hell thats one helluva story. I can't imagine the heartache that must have caused. But kudos to you for working through all that crap. Actually thats one of the reason I decided to compete again, I felt my self discipline was sliding. No better way to get it back then to compete.

And I agree, once she sees my 6 pack coming out again, she'll be bummed. Let her screw around with all the losers from the local bar. Thanks for the motivation.

Plang said:

The last 3 weeks of my very first show I found out my gf at the time was cheating on me with a 17 yr old...lots of drama and stress...the show gave me something to focus on...it seemed like the end of the world at the time...she was one of my employees and I took the high road and got a transfer (even though I was taking a 2-3k dollar paycut leaving an established location that I was at from opening day on)...it all worked out as I later met the girl of my dreams who runs circles around my ex....who btw has now gained 30lbs and doesn't even look near the same...use it as ur fuel...yr motivation

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Yea the karma's a bitch for her eh??:laugh:
Your short term loss turned into long time gain. Kinda a metaphor for something else eh?

The Survivor said:

Yea the karma's a bitch for her eh??:laugh:
Your short term loss turned into long time gain. Kinda a metaphor for something else eh?

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Yup...I'm a big beleiver in karma....




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Everyone goes through it. I tried everything.... Really the only thing that heals is time.

if your interested. I have a heartbreak story i just updated. Check it out... might help.

maybe keeping your gear levels at the same range might help. Its the drops and spikes that fuck up your head.