Pickup lines that failed miserably!

[Auriflex]

Let's have em!  And say also what the consequence was!  Don't be shy!

I would give some, but I have never failed.

[tiny]

dunno.. but here's a bump.. i need a laugh.. :(

[dedprez*]

<!--emo&+=--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sarcasm.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='+='><!--endemo-->

[Auriflex]

Ok, here's one I'm sure wouldn't work!

Hey there 'Love Machine' - need some oiling?

Be ready to duck and run.

[Gear101*]

hey baby the first drinks on me maybe later i can get on you... &nbsp;after saying this to some nice young lady i stronly recommend that you take a big step back because you might get slapped.. but if not your in like my man FLIN... <!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo-->

[Gear101*]

or even better.. hay baby I'm your knight in white shining armor.. get on your knee and take my sword.. that one will get you hit every time... och that hurt &nbsp;:(

[tiny]

<!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo--> &nbsp;<!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo--> &nbsp;<!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo-->

[Gear101*]

one more.. hey you know you look really good in that dress you're waring, *but i bet you look good in nothing.. know that one takes some thought so you can kill three bird with one stone 1) you can find out how fast she can think on her feet. 2) slide to comp in on her nice body 3) see if she will let you see her with nothing on.. <!--emo&{)--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rolleyes.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{)'><!--endemo--> &nbsp;and for you slower guys number 3 is the most important.. OK

[Gear101*]

one more and that's it i'm done with this thread.. there are only two things that sux in live warm beer and cold women.. and honey you look hot..

true story though if all the beer was ice cold and all the women were hot live would be alot better <!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo-->

[tiny]

you haven't gotten any in a while huh.. &nbsp;<!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo-->

tiny

[Gear101*]

Ok last one and i mean it this time.. this is an old one.. hey baby how about going back to my place and playing the home version of the Love Connection..

[Gear101*]

<!--QuoteBegin--tiny+Mar. 14 2002,5:49--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (tiny @ Mar. 14 2002,5:49)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->you haven't gotten any in a while huh.. *<!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo-->

tiny[/quote]
i'm married now so ahe has to put up with all my corny shit.. i fell sorry for her.. but it keeps her laughing.. like this one

hey baby let's hit it.. she falls for that one all the time..

[gearedup]

http://www.pure-zero.com/funny/capacity.jpg

[tiny]

BWAAHAHAHahaha... :D

tiny

[Dezir]

Geared......lmao!!!!

[enchantra]

lmao y'all r 2 much

[rico*]

Well heres a few bad ones.
That dress looks good on you ,Lets see what it looks like crumpled up in a ball on my floor?

you have nice lips,I wonder how they would look wraped around my c*<!--emo&**--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/devil.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='**'><!--endemo-->?

Ok that should get you slapped.Or in spanish

&quot;toca la chocha?&quot; <!--emo&{}--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='{}'><!--endemo--> I love that one.

[tubby]

Here's my favorite....

Hey baby...wanna FUCK!

NOW....9 out of ten times this gets you smacked but 1 time out of those ten you get her!!!!! &nbsp;I'll take them odds....plus not bullshitting about how pretty they are BLAH BLAH.....just BANG BANG BANG!!!!!

tubbs

[Fitnessgirl19]

Here's a few:

Hey, I have to get up at 8:30 tomorrow, can you set your alarm?

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

Nice shoes, wanna fu(k??

Were your parents bakers? &nbsp;Cuz you got some nice buns!

[rico*]

<!--QuoteBegin--Fitnessgirl19+Mar. 15 2002,12:13--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Fitnessgirl19 @ Mar. 15 2002,12:13)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->Here's a few:

Hey, I have to get up at 8:30 tomorrow, can you set your alarm?

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

Nice shoes, wanna fu(k??

Were your parents bakers? *Cuz you got some nice buns![/quote]
<!--emo&+=--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sarcasm.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='+='><!--endemo--> &nbsp;I thought they looked like good pickup lines. hmmm

[ancalagon]

Once in a bar me and a friend had a bet who's gonna get slapped in the face by a chick first. I lost... The friend just went over to a chick and said: &quot;may I beat your cunt with a billet?&quot;

After the initial shock he got slapped, so I guess that was a poor pickup line.

[mr456]

Here is a few sure fire smacks upside your head!

1. Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here!

2. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go fuck.

3. Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.

4. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

5. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.

6. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

7. That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming, too.

8. I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

9. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.

10. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big-Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

11. Wanna play house? You be the screen door and I'll bang you all night long.

12. If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

13. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille nametag.

14. If you were a car, I would wax you and ride you all over town.

15. Excuse me, do you wanna fuck, or should I apologize.

16. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

17. Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?

18. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.

19. You be the tree, and I'll wrap you like a Koala.

20. Hi my name is __. Remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long.

21. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

22. Want to play conductor? You be the engineer and I'll go choo choo.

23. You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.

24. The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.

25. Hi, my name is Skippy, like the peanut butter -- I stick to the roof of your mouth.

26. Hi, my name is Pogo, want to jump on my stick?

[MAX]

I got the F the C and the K, all i need is U <!--emo&GG--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/bigsmile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='GG'><!--endemo-->

[ragintiger]

You are looking sad and lonely, how about a little vitamin ME?

[Gear101*]

ok it's your birthday.. walk up to some chick that you know and want to hit.. tell her that it's your b-day and after she gives you a kiss on the cheek.. point down at your zipper and say&quot; IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY TOO.&quot; works everytime

[upnorth]

In the morning..How would you like your eggs.. Scrambled or Fertilized??? .&lt;