Munkeee de Sade
New member
An old classic!!
>
> BLOW JOBS!!!!
>
>WHAT A GIRL HAS TO SAY ON THE SUBJECT
>
>
>1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.
>
>2. Extension to rule #1 - So if you get one, be
>grateful.
>
>3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you
>saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's
>face.
>
>4. Extension to rule #3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.
>
>
>5. My ears are NOT handles.
>
>6. Extension to rule #5 - do not push on the top of my
>head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And
>additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?
>
>7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to
>fart.
>
>8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer
>week" - get it through your head - I'm bloated and I
>feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly
>obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex
>right now.
>
>9. Extension to #8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on
>high school girls - if you're that desperate, go jerk
>off and leave me alone with my Midol.
>
>10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my
>teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.
>
>11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games
>immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you
>would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.
>
>12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not
>to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just
>enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it.
>See also rule #2 about gratitude.
>
>13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I
>don't care about
>the protein content.
>
>14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.
>15. When you hear your friends complain about how they
>don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth
>shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or
>brag.
>
>16. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not
>mean I have to "kiss it good morning."
>
> WHAT A MAN HAS TO SAY
>ON THE SUBJECT
>
>
>
>
>1. First of all, yes you're obligated to do it. If you
>don't, we will find someone (younger, prettier and
>dirtier) who will.
>
>2. Second, swallowing a teaspoon full of cream is a
>hell of a lot easier
>than licking a dead fish.
>
>3. You want to talk about farting? Does the word
>"queef" mean anything to you?
>
>4. I will use your ears as I see fit. don't worry
>about it and be thankful I'm not pulling your hair.
>
>5. When you're on your period, stuffing something in
>your mouth is the only way to stop you from bitching
>and moaning. Suck it up!
>
>6. Speaking of which, if you are bleeding for five
>straight days, you need all the fluids you can get.
>Trust me.
>
>7. You bitch about the taste, but trust me when I tell
>you that we get the short end of the stick in flavor
>country.
>
>8. At least there is no danger of a dick bleeding in
>your mouth.
>
>9. Play with the balls.
>
>10. No matter how good you think you are at it, we've
>had better.
>
>11. Caress the ass, too. We like that!
>
>12. Make hay when the sun shines. It's "wide awake" in
>the morning now, but when you get old & fat and
>looking for some action, I gah-ron-tee it'll be "sound
>asleep."
>
>13. If you swallow, then you don't have to worry about
>getting any on your face, now will you?
>
> BLOW JOBS!!!!
>
>WHAT A GIRL HAS TO SAY ON THE SUBJECT
>
>
>1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.
>
>2. Extension to rule #1 - So if you get one, be
>grateful.
>
>3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you
>saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's
>face.
>
>4. Extension to rule #3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.
>
>
>5. My ears are NOT handles.
>
>6. Extension to rule #5 - do not push on the top of my
>head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And
>additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?
>
>7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to
>fart.
>
>8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer
>week" - get it through your head - I'm bloated and I
>feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly
>obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex
>right now.
>
>9. Extension to #8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on
>high school girls - if you're that desperate, go jerk
>off and leave me alone with my Midol.
>
>10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my
>teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.
>
>11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games
>immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you
>would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.
>
>12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not
>to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just
>enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it.
>See also rule #2 about gratitude.
>
>13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I
>don't care about
>the protein content.
>
>14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.
>15. When you hear your friends complain about how they
>don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth
>shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or
>brag.
>
>16. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not
>mean I have to "kiss it good morning."
>
> WHAT A MAN HAS TO SAY
>ON THE SUBJECT
>
>
>
>
>1. First of all, yes you're obligated to do it. If you
>don't, we will find someone (younger, prettier and
>dirtier) who will.
>
>2. Second, swallowing a teaspoon full of cream is a
>hell of a lot easier
>than licking a dead fish.
>
>3. You want to talk about farting? Does the word
>"queef" mean anything to you?
>
>4. I will use your ears as I see fit. don't worry
>about it and be thankful I'm not pulling your hair.
>
>5. When you're on your period, stuffing something in
>your mouth is the only way to stop you from bitching
>and moaning. Suck it up!
>
>6. Speaking of which, if you are bleeding for five
>straight days, you need all the fluids you can get.
>Trust me.
>
>7. You bitch about the taste, but trust me when I tell
>you that we get the short end of the stick in flavor
>country.
>
>8. At least there is no danger of a dick bleeding in
>your mouth.
>
>9. Play with the balls.
>
>10. No matter how good you think you are at it, we've
>had better.
>
>11. Caress the ass, too. We like that!
>
>12. Make hay when the sun shines. It's "wide awake" in
>the morning now, but when you get old & fat and
>looking for some action, I gah-ron-tee it'll be "sound
>asleep."
>
>13. If you swallow, then you don't have to worry about
>getting any on your face, now will you?
