kossdeh
New member
An Australian ventriloquist is visiting Wicklow on
his holidays, and happens upon a small village. On the
road into the village he spies a local farmer leaning
on his gate patting his dog, so he figures he'll have
a little bit of good-natured fun. Ventriloquist:
"G'day Mate! Good-looking dog, mind
if I speak to him?" Villager: "The dog doesn't talk,
ya stupid Aussie." Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's
it going mate?" Dog: "Doin' all right." Villager:
(look of extreme shock) Ventriloquist: "Is this
villager your owner?" (pointing at the villager) Dog:
"Yep" Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?" Dog:
"Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great
food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Villager: (look of utter disbelief) Ventriloquist:
"Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Villager: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either... I
think." Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool" Villager: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at
the villager) Horse: "Yep" Ventriloquist: "How does
he treat you?" Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking.
He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and
keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Villager: (total look of amazement) Ventriloquist:
"Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Villager: "Listen mister, the sheep's a fuckin' liar."
his holidays, and happens upon a small village. On the
road into the village he spies a local farmer leaning
on his gate patting his dog, so he figures he'll have
a little bit of good-natured fun. Ventriloquist:
"G'day Mate! Good-looking dog, mind
if I speak to him?" Villager: "The dog doesn't talk,
ya stupid Aussie." Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's
it going mate?" Dog: "Doin' all right." Villager:
(look of extreme shock) Ventriloquist: "Is this
villager your owner?" (pointing at the villager) Dog:
"Yep" Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?" Dog:
"Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great
food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Villager: (look of utter disbelief) Ventriloquist:
"Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Villager: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either... I
think." Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool" Villager: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at
the villager) Horse: "Yep" Ventriloquist: "How does
he treat you?" Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking.
He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and
keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Villager: (total look of amazement) Ventriloquist:
"Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Villager: "Listen mister, the sheep's a fuckin' liar."
